Non-Scale Victory

This morning I put on my favorite, most comfortable non-lounger pants, and guess what?  They are now unacceptable for public wearing!  They're too loose and look stupid.  Whee!

Plus, I should have a scale victory when I weigh myself next.  I'm knocking on wood all over place now, but if all goes as I believe it will, I should meet the 50 lbs lost mark for my Sunday weigh-in.  It's all very exciting!  To me, anyway.

Losing It

I knew it couldn't last forever.  Everything was going great.  No complications, no nausea, no diarrhea, a little bit the opposite way, but nothing a little Activia couldn't fix.  I've had stalls, but they don't last forever, my sleeve is doing its job making sure I don't overdo it, I've been walking regularly and feeling great.  I have not felt hungry in two months.

And then... ugh.  Then I washed my hair this morning and had clumps of hair falling out.  I knew this was coming.  It typically starts in the third month post surgery.  I enter the third month tomorrow.  I'm right on track.  I was really hoping to avoid this part, but very few people do.  I know it's temporary, and it's not like I'm going to lose all my hair (dear lord, I hope not, anyway), but it still sucks.

I need to color my roots.  They're too dark, and I have far too many gray strands coming in.  I fear, however, that even more hair will fall out if I pump it full of chemicals, so I'll just have to deal.

So.  My first real complaint.  Is it enough to make me regret my decision?  Hell fucking no.  I don't like it, but I sure like the 44 pounds I've lost.  I love how good I feel, how I don't lose my breath walking up the steps to my apartment, how my car is easier to steer now that my big belly isn't in the way of the steering wheel anymore.

Yep.  Still the best decision I've ever made. 

Still here

I have been awfully quiet lately, but no news is good news.  Everything has been smooth sailing,  41 pounds gone already, blood pressure is awesome, and I have a lot of energy.

My one complaint is not being able to eat and drink at the same time, and especially having to wait at least 30 minutes (though for me, it's more like an hour) after eating to be able to drink something.  30 minutes is the guideline from my nutritionist, but that's usually too soon for me. 

I just got done eating, and I'm so freakin' thirsty right now.  All I want to do is guzzle some ice cold water, or even just sip some, but it'll hurt if I do.  Argh.  It's a minor thing obviously, considering the benefits of surgery, but right now is the worst it has been, so I'm being whiny.  Maybe I'll try sucking on an ice cube.  Oh!  I still have some SF popsicles left!  That should help, and I don't think it'll hurt.  Score!

Little Sleevie Wonder strikes again

On my way home from seeing New Moon today, I stopped by a little nearby grocery store for some soup.  They have a good selection, so it was a big decision, but I chose the butternut squash soup.  Maybe not the best choice, as there's little to no protein in it, but I figured I could just add some dried milk to it. 

I bought the smallest container for obvious reasons, and also because I don't know the nutritional value, so I don't want to eat it for more than one meal, two at the most.

The soup was so very yummy.  After my first bite, I was all, "I'm going to eat it all for sure.  So good!"  I was certain I would be able to eat the entire eight ounces, and honestly, I was pretty excited about it.  It turned out not to be the case.  I started feeling full after three spoonfuls.  Three!  I shoveled a couple more spoons in, but still ended up eating only about a quarter of it before I was stuffed.  I thought soup was a slider food!

Now, it may seem as though I'm complaining, and I can't deny that I was a little disappointed not to be able to eat more of the yummy soup, but there are other meals, and mostly I just wanted to say once again how much I love my sleeve.  It really does its job!

Restriction rocks!

Every evening, I plan my meals for the next day.  My main goal is to make sure I get at least 60 grams of protein a day.  Beyond that, I'm trying to take in around 600 calories and fewer than 50 grams of carbs. 

I've tried some different proteins in the past few days, and have found that I'm not ready for dense protein yet.  I can only take a few bites before I'm full, and it's leaving me without enough protein and calories for the day.

I went back to softer food, but with the amount I can eat, I don't get enough protein if I eat three food meals a day.  I decided on food for breakfast and dinner, and protein shakes for lunch and snacks. 

That's all well and good, but when lunch time came today, I didn't want a shake.  Hmm.  What to do?  I know the way my brain works, and figured I would make my dinner for lunch, then have the shake for dinner, and I wouldn't have a choice then, so I would be fine with it.  It's not that I was hungry for lunch, I just wanted food.  Without the choice for dinner, my brain would accept it. 

However.  I made my lunch (1/4 cup refried beans with reduced fat cheese, salsa, and a dollop of Greek yogurt), and was full after three bites.  I'll finish the rest of it for dinner, I still have to fit the shake in somewhere, and I didn't lose any protein, nor did I lose or gain any calories, and I still get food for all three meals.  Score!

I love my sleeve!

Midway through the third week

I'm not doing very well keeping up with this blog.  I want some sort of documentation of my process, so I need to get better.

I had a bad day yesterday when I weighed in and had somehow gained two pounds.  Why the face?  I'm assuming it was water retention, because I can't possibly gain weight when I'm eating 600 calories a day.  So that sucked.  I'm going to let a few days go by and weigh myself again Wednesday to make sure the number is going in the right direction.

I'm eating soft solid food now.  I can easily tell the difference in restriction as opposed to liquids and purees.  I can't take much more than a few small bites before I start to feel full.  Little Sleevie Wonder is definitely doing his job.  I can't eat a whole scrambled egg.  I, and sorry if this starts to get gross, couldn't finish two shrimp.  I almost did, but I ended up spitting out the last bite instead of swallowing it.  I'm terrified of the slimies.

I've learned that I can't have liquids near me when I eat, otherwise I'll mindlessly take a drink.  Yeah, learned that one the hard way.  Ouch.  Watching the clock to make sure I stop drinking half an hour before eating can be annoying, but I understand why I have to do it, and now I've experienced the consequences of drinking while eating.  I don't plan to do it again.

I still haven't felt any real hunger, though I did experience some head hunger over the weekend.  It was nothing a good fanfic couldn't cure.  Thankfully it hasn't come back since.  I think it was in response to being able to eat regular food for the first time.  My foody brain was all, "Mmmmm... food!  We should eat more.  Yum!"  And my stomach was all, "Yeah, you go ahead and try that.  I bet I can change your mind."  Then my Edwardy brain was all, "Hey!  Clipped Wings and Inked Armor just updated!"  Then I read and by the time I finished the chapter is was time for a protein shake and all was well.

Speaking of, it is time for a protein shake now.

Puree stage

When I started this blog, the idea was that I would have a place to piss and moan about pain or hunger or whatever.  The thing is, I really don't have anything to whine about. 

I stopped taking pain medication two days after surgery.  I didn't need it, and it was blurring my vision.  I haven't had any pain.  My incisions occasionally are uncomfortable, but that's mainly the fault of my cat, who is always walking on me.

Eating has been good as well.  I thought the week of liquids would be torture.  It wasn't.  I found some good protein shakes, had some soup, and had to remind myself to eat.  It was fine.

This past Saturday started my week of purees.  Sounds kinda disgusting, but I'm actually enjoying my pureed food.  I started off with refried beans with some melted reduced fat cheddar.  It was delicious.  I made four meals out of one can of refried beans, and I didn't get sick of it. 

I'm eating pureed peaches with fat free cottage cheese once a day, also yummy.  Last night I tried some instant mashed potatoes with reduced fat cream of chicken soup as gravy.  It was very good, but at first I could only get about two tablespoons down.  I heated it up a little later and was able to get another couple of tablespoons down, but I don't think I'll try that again any time soon.

Depending on what it is, I usually can eat anywhere from 1/4 to 1/2 cup at a time.  The peaches and cottage cheese goes down really well with 1/4 cup of each.  I tried half a cup of chili for lunch, and was full about halfway through.

It's going to take some time before I get used to serving myself just a small dollop of food.  My eyes might literally be bigger than my stomach now.  I tend to start with half a cup because I just can't fathom that a quarter cup will be enough.  For the most part, it is plenty.  Maybe even too much.  For instance, my meal plan suggests a snack of 1/4 cup of hummus.  I ended up eating one tablespoon instead.  That's not to say I won't have another tablespoon of hummus later, because I fucking love hummus, but even then, it'll still be half of the suggested serving. 

Taste-wise, I've enjoyed the pureed food I've tried so far.  Quantity-wise, I'm not feeling deprived at all.  I get full quickly, and I'm never hungry.  Ever. 

As of yesterday, I was 14 pounds down from my weigh-in right before surgery, and 28 pounds total since starting the pre-op diet.  So cool!  I want to keep weighing myself every morning, but that will only lead to frustration.  I'll try to keep it to once a week.  It'll be twice this week, but that's because I'll be weighed when I see my nutritionist Thursday morning.

All in all, I'm loving my sleeve!